we all have sizeable scars.

schedule.

Wed, 19 Jul 2006 17:20:29 GMT

Some of you have yet to add my new LJ name thebiggestlie_x so here's my school schedule if you haven't seen it yet :

First Semester:
1st hour - Algebra 2 w/ Mrs. Kowalski.
2nd hour - Theater Production w/ Mr. Sill.
3rd hour - Chem. Com w/ Mrs. Schrimscher.
4th hour - Spanish 3 w/ Mrs. Sinutko (YES)
5th hour - Myth, Tale, and Legend w/ Mrs. Mordenski.
6th hour - World Religions w/ Mrs Larkin.
7th hour - American History w/ Sister Marianne.

Second Sememster:
1st hour - Algebra 2 w/ Mrs. Kowalski.
2nd hour - Spanish 3 w/ Ms. LaBelle (maybe, i might drop out)
3rd hour - Chem. Com w/ Mrs. Schrimscher.
4th hour - Lit into Film w/ Mr. Baker (oh god)
5th hour - Free Hour
6th hour - Relationships w/ Mrs. Ewald (kill me now).
7th hour - American History w/ Sister Marianne.

My schedule is posted everywhere, well myspace and livejournal, but shh.
Let me know if we have any classes together.

NEW LJ.

Wed, 03 May 2006 21:36:21 GMT

thebiggestlie_x
thebiggestlie_x
thebiggestlie_x

add me!

guess what?

Mon, 30 Jan 2006 01:02:26 GMT

i'm only doing this cuz i hate anonymous comments. such sweet ones do not deserve to be anonymous.

i feel like shit.

Sat, 28 Jan 2006 22:29:10 GMT

i dunno what to do.
i'm so confused.
i feel so helpless :/

what did i just do?
i'm not like this anymore.
i stopped 2 years ago.
so why did i do it again?
i'm such an idiot.

complete opposite of yesterday.

Fri, 27 Jan 2006 22:50:16 GMT

whoever posted that anonymous comment should tell me who they are cuz i wanna know!!!
ANYWAYS, i had so much fun at school today. i absolutly love my friends with all my heart.

1st : slept in geometry.
2nd : did pilates in gym. lmao catie and i were struggling with it so much & we were cracking up at the video.
3rd : off with briana. went to the computer lab and blasted hilary duff. christina [stalker] and her friends walked in and started blasting foo fighters so briana and i started singing "beat of my heart" really loud lmfao. i ran out of the room and ran into the door. then we were dancing down the hallways singing "AWAY AWAY. AWAY AWAAAAAAAAAY". briana ran into her friend when she was singing so that was fun too.
4th : did my homework like a good girl O:]
5th : sat with gibby and tried to study. we were talking too much about last year and how renee, her, and i met thanks to my gay star dude :P lmao. i went up to get a laptop and lawrence davenport was like "this pumpkins asleep!" and im like "WTF!?"
6th : values. last time i'll see donna before she moves back to syria :[[[[[
7th : an hour of bio. wow i dont even know what to say to that.

emma was just downing this huge chocolate candy bar on the bus. i laughed. now i'm just waiting for my mom to get home so i can go shopping for dresses before its too late! our soph semi theme is masquerade and its kinda funny cuz i just remembered i put that in our little suggestion box with renee and now, i'm not too sure i like that idea. ah well.

& i'm excited for tomorrow :]

bahh i'm such a whiney bitch.

Thu, 26 Jan 2006 21:27:39 GMT

nothing is going right.
everything seems to be plummeting downhill.

why do i even bother looking at my photo album? the only thing that lingers in it is memories, and some that i dont even want to remember. i wish i never opened that damn thing again. so many good memories with my friends, but what happened to them all? half the friends i have dont even talk to me as much as they used to. zach and i are so distant, i hate it. we used to hang out everday and i havent even seen the kid in 3 months or more.

bahh.

just when i thought things couldnt get any worse, they do.
i think i fucked up everything :[

on a lighter note...

Wed, 25 Jan 2006 01:44:32 GMT

i found out some pretty interesting things today online. like how joe is a rapist and that naughty nick streaks through the streets of downtown wayne banging every mailbox in sight.

i'm so glad i know these kids.
jealous?
you are. i can see it in your eyes.

:O!!!
oh shnizzle! i forgot to finish the rest of my homework!

sing me something soft.

Mon, 23 Jan 2006 22:49:14 GMT

haha before school briana and i went down to the lockers to do my homework cuz there were no desks in the library, computer lab, or cafe. scary huh?

1st hour : off with briana. went to the cafe for a bit then i decided to get help in math from the nollster.

2nd hour : off with briana, catie, and gibby. went to the cafe again lol. got some pop & cheeze its cuz im just that healthy, and then went to the computer lab and hacked onto myspace lyke omgzzz.

3rd hour : had a mod and chilled with briana for like, 20 minutes and i was like, "have fun being lonely" and some random chick in the room was like "SHE HAS MEEE!" and briana mouths "who the hell is that?" lmfao. yeah so bruggie was being really scary today and i was the only one that knew answers to the questions and i just read off of cliff notes lmao.

4th hour : MY FAV CLASS. vita. vita. vita. vita sinutko. bri and i's chant :D talked about conocer and saber in espanol.

5th hour : off with renee and steph. showed renee my star picture. "WOO I CAN FLY!" lmfao. thenn i went to the cafe, AGAIN, with steph, and got some fries [stephanie loves her some fries] and chips and another pop. yupp. mercy is full of healthy products.

6th hour : okay ewald is officially the craziest teacher i've had, but shes awesome. we talked about jesus, cuz you know, jesus is pretty much the coolest guy ever.

7th hour : OMG SHOOT ME. i hate bio. an hours worth of notes. i dont even know what we're learning lmao.

i'm gunna start updating like this more often again, cuz everyone loves to hear about my day :] people missed out on a previous discussion bruggie had with the class about rape and fingering. yup. foundations just isnt the same as your brit lit ;]

yeah so im gunna be home alone until 7 today :[ i hate being alone...

this is what my day was consumed of.

Mon, 23 Jan 2006 00:36:26 GMT

LiveJournal Relationships by Tell Me How It Ends
Username
Your LJ Stalker:	satanicnun00
You secretly want to have sex with:	ccjoe
You took something from and they want it back:	d3v0
Has an altar for you in their closet:	minameisknown
Wants to murder you:	brikbrakattack
You want to murder:	lambslayer2
Wears pink underwear:	the_lovely_meg
Doesn	dear___lie_____
Thinks this quiz is uber-stupid:	flamex

Quiz created with MemeGen!

interesting...

Livejournal confessions... by xLiveLoveBurnDiex
Username
Age?
Shagged a dog...	krazyswtkute72
Loves you..	____ohhtragedy
Wanks over old ladies..	pornxxninja
Is a music whore....	masterlink23
Has a bunny blanket...	dear___lie_____
Plays with a barbie doll?	flamex
Used to watch the tweenies	satanicnun00
Was in the girl scouts?	lambslayer2
Is proffesional skinnydipper?	gibsternator
You will bang..?	ccjoe

Quiz created with MemeGen!

i always had a strange feeling jason played with barbies ;]

Livejournal Pranks by xvanillafanatic
Username
Pulls your hair	____ohhtragedy
Kicks you	krazyswtkute72
Scratches you	blondeatheart_
Makes fun of you	indescribable27
Makes fun of your mom	satanicnun00
Mocks you	pornxxninja
Bites you	gibsternator
Cuts you	um_gummybear
Kills your friend	dear___lie_____
Your now dead friend	the_lovely_meg

Quiz created with MemeGen!

you know what rachel, if you really didn't like my mom, you could have just told me :P

Your LJ Horror Movie (you are the main target in the movie) by shard_of_truth
Username
the storyteller	d3v0
the first to get killed	satanicnun00
the virgin	blondeatheart_
the one having sex when killed	ccjoe
the given "nude shot"	xmascara13x
the given "gore death scene"	brikbrakattack
the one thought as the killer but isn't	gibsternator
the one framed as the killer but isn't	indescribable27
the screamer	lambslayer2
the humorous one	dear___lie_____
the killer/monster	pornxxninja

Quiz created with MemeGen!

haha joe... & i can see courtney as the monster ;]

stole this from caitlin.

Sat, 21 Jan 2006 18:27:06 GMT

post anonymously.

1. one secret.
2. one compliment.
3. one random thing.
4. one love note.
5. lyrics to a song.
6. how old you are.
7. how long we've been friends.
8. a hint to who you are.

happiness :]

Fri, 20 Jan 2006 23:40:54 GMT

i've been so happy. i love this. i can't ever remember when i was so happy. i think tomorrow briana rob joe and i are gunna try and hang out.

friggen sweet.

i thought i was gunna run over a kid today when i was driving home, but it was just a sign :]
cuz that makes it all the better to crash into.
but i didnt crash.
so hah.

What Your Face Says

At first glance, people see you as warm and well-balanced.

Overall, your true self is creative and expressive.

With friends, you seem dramatic, lively, and quick to react.

In love, you seem like a huge flirt.

In stressful situation, you seem like you're oblivious to the stress.

What Do People Think Of Your Face?

haha that sounds like me :]

in your eyes, i lost my place.

Tue, 17 Jan 2006 21:58:29 GMT

this is my off hour schedule. tell me if your off with me :D

1st - off day 5
2nd - off day 5
3rd - off day 3
4th - off day 3
5th - off everyday
6th - off day 2
7th - off day 2

so ms. ewald is a crazy bitch. good lord, what have i gotten myself into? lol. today was pretty fun though, aside from vita's long lecture on what hostel's were today in spanish lol.

stephanies starting to like this boy a lot more, but what else is new?

L//O/O/K/ /A/T/ /M/E/
x Whats your natural hair color?: dirty blonde
x What is your current hair color? dirty blonde
x What color are your eyes: uhm, i guess grayish blue
x Current Piercings?: 0
x Long or Short Hair?: longish
x Straight or Curly? straight when straightened. naturally wavy

/C/U/R/R/E/N/T/L/Y/ W/E/A/R/I/N/G
x What shirt are you wearing? mercy shirt
x shorts/pants/ are you wearing?: mercy skirt
x Rings?: yeah
x Braclets?: no
x Necklaces?: nope
x Is your hair up or down: down

/T/H/I/S/ O/R/ /T/H/A/T/
Rock or Rap: rock
Coffee or Hot Cocoa: coffee
Baseball or Softball: baseball
Wild Night out or Romantic Night in: hmm, how about a wild night with a little romance kicked in? ;]
Chocolate or Vanilla: vanilla
Bracelet or Necklace: necklace
Pink or Purple: pink
History or Science: neither
Sleep in or Early to rise: sleep in
Beach or Boardwalk: both
Hoodie or Tee Shirt: hoodie
Night Or Day: night
High School or College: high school
White or Black: black
love or fun: love
California or Florida: florida
Simple Plan or Good Charlotte: good charlotte, i guess? their old stuff is still their best lol
Love at first sight or Learn to Love: learn to love
Babe or Baby: babe

/H/A/V/E/ Y/O/U/ E/V/E/R/

Kissed the opposite sex?: yeah
Kissed the same Sex?: yeah
Hugged someone?: mhm. i <3 hugs
Been on the phone until the sun came up?: no
Put a song on repeat for more than 2 hours?: mhm
Gone Skinny dipping?: no
Laughed so hard you pissed in your pants? haha yes! the seagulls w/ caitlin! lmao

/T/H/E/ L/A/S/T/
person you talked to in person?: my mom
Person you talked to online?: caitlin
person you talked to on the phone: my mom
last time you had a shower?: 2 days ago :\ im taking one today, chill out ;]

/R/A/N/D/O/M/
Do you like surveys?: mhm. love em.
Do you ever wonder what your life will be like 10 years down the road?: yeah
Do you get along with your parents?: most of the time
Are you old enough to vote?: nope
Are you happy?: no
Are you sad?: yeah
Do you have mental breakdowns?: i've had a couple, but most of them are more of an emotional breakdown
Did you ever tell your parents you didn't feel good so you didn't have to go to school?: mhm
Do you have a cell phone: yeah. call meh!

movie day :D

Mon, 16 Jan 2006 05:10:53 GMT

after my mom finished listening to her hella weird music, i drove to caitlins where i ran a stop sign lmfao. my mom was like "STOP SIGN STOP SIGN STOP SIGN!!" my bad. we went to see hostel. fucking weird movie. i saw more boobs than blood! lol. we came home and watched the "uncorked" addition of wedding crashers. fucking love that movie. my mom was like, pissing herself on the couch lol.

the deleted scene of todd was the best. "DEATH, YOU ARE MY BITCH LOVERRR" i recorded it on my phone :D
yup, imma dork.

but for some reason today, the day of my dads death was replaying in my head a lot, which was not good. reality is a bitch, and its definatly sinking in.

&& i still wonder if he likes me? its so confusing. probably not though. since when has a guy liked me at the same time i liked him? hmm. never!

i was told i was beautiful, but what does that mean to you?

Sun, 15 Jan 2006 05:03:29 GMT

i hate how self concious i am. i hate how low my self esteem is. i wish i could just change everything that bugged me and be fine again. i feel like the ugliest thing to roam the earth. i talked to my mom about everything and anything. i literally told her everything i hated about me and what was bugging me in life. i was thinking so much today. i cant escape the insults from anyone. no one knows how much it hurts to be called "skinny". its like being called fat. theres really no difference. it still makes you feel like shit. people who tell me they want to be tall like me...no, you dont really. i hate being tall. so much really. i can never find guys taller than me and when i do its like OMGZ YOUR A GOD.

okay i have to stop feeling sorry for myself and making the people who are reading this feel sorry for me.
so to you, reader, i apologize.

f i r s t s
First car: havent gotten one yet

First real kiss: it didnt mean anything so it wasnt real

First break-up: mat lmfao

First screen name: sweetieq841

First self purchased album: backstreet boys

First funeral: my grandpa

First pets: keke

First piercing/tattoo: hasnt happened yet

First credit card: dont have one

First enemy: this britany girl that used to live on my street

l a s t s
Last car ride: going out to the movies with brett and lindsay

Last kiss: like 2 years ago

Last good cry: today

Last library book checked out: i have no idea

Last movie seen: saw 2 T_T

Last beverage drank: gatorade. you know me and my gatorade :D

Last food consumed: munch ems

Last crush: :X theres 2.

Last phone call: lindsay

Last time showered: yesterday

Last shoes worn: black slip ons

Last item bought: wedding crashers along with a necklace

Last annoyance: myself lol

Last time wanting to die: yesterday

f a s h i o n | s t u f f
Where is your favorite place to shop? wet seal

Any tattoos or piercings? no

What kind of shampoo do you use? head and shoulders

What are you most scared of? death and needles

What are you listening to right now? unpretty - TLC

How many buddies are online right now? 36

What would you change about yourself? thinness, definatly

f a v o r i t e s
Color: pink and lime green

Food: chicken

Boys' names: sean, seth, aaron, and josh

Girls' names: danielle, juliet, nicole, and lexi

Subjects in school: actings over for the year, but i still love it

Animals: cats

Sports: eh

Perfume: love spell

Cologne: axe

h a v e | y o u | e v e r
Given anyone a bath? yeah

Bungee jumped? nope

Made yourself throw up? no

Skinny dipped? no

Ever been in love? yes

Made yourself cry to get out of trouble? when i was little lol

Actually seen your crush naked? no

Cried when someone died? of course

Lied? yeah

Fallen for your best friend? yeah :\ bad idea

Been rejected? all the time

Rejected someone? yup

Used someone? no. thats not right

Done something you regret? just recently actually!

c u r r e n t
Clothes: black sweats, black tank top, and black hoodie. im so gothic

Music: did you not just ask me this not too long ago?

Make-up: none anymore

Smell: nothing lol

Desktop picture: random background

CD in player: the used

DVD in player: family guy

Color of toenails: natural now lol

l a s t | p e r s o n
You touched: myself

Hugged: my mom

You imed: catie

IMed you: caitlin

You kissed: pft idk

Cuddled with: :\ no one

a r e | y o u
Understanding: when i actually understand lol

Open-minded: very

Arrogant: idk

Insecure: duh

Interesting: always :D

Hungry: yes

Smart: sorta

Moody: yeah

Hardworking: sometimes

Organized: mostly

Shy: only around people i dont know

Attractive: i'll get back to you on that

Bored easily: yes

Responsible: yeah

Obsessive: nope

Angry: not now

Sad: yeah :[

Happy: not now

Hyper: not now

Trusting: it takes a while

Talkative: only around people i know and like

w h o | d o | y o u | w a n n a
Kill: no one

Slap: no one

Look like: idk

Talk to offline: some people

Talk to online: some people

w h i c h | i s | b e t t e r
Coke or Pepsi: pepsi

Flowers or Candy: flowers

Tall or Short: tall

r a n d o m
In the morning I am: tired

All you need is: love

Love is: complicating and usually results in heartbreak

Last person you danced with: lindsay

Worst question to ask: "why does your face look like that?"

Worst statement: i have no idea.

Who makes you laugh the most: brett

Who makes you smile: everyone

Who gives you a funny feeling when you see them: well...

Who has a crush on you: no one that i know of

d o | y o u | e v e r
Sit on the internet all night waiting for that someone to IM you: yeah

Wish you were a member of the opposite sex: no

Wish you were younger: yes

n u m b e r
Of times I have had my heart broken: 12

Of hearts I have broken: i have no idea

Of guys I've kissed: 2

Of girls I've kissed: 0

Of continents I have lived on: 1

Of tight friends: 8

Of CDs I own: over 90

hair-rr-ry? the 2nd r's silent.

Sat, 14 Jan 2006 02:55:32 GMT

caitlin and i watched dumb and dumberer today. omg i missed that movie. then we went to the mall and i got a shirt and some guys in the basement were yelling BOOBA at me.

i've felt terrible all day. what did i fucking just do? that was definatly not me, i stopped that years ago. it's not the same, but it brought back so many bad memories. i definatly dont want to stray down that path again. i feel so guilty, so ashamed...why would i do that? its a part of growing up, realizing your mistakes. i just wish my anxiety would go away. i feel like i fucking have to tell my mom everything and i cant keep doing that!

wtf?

Fri, 13 Jan 2006 13:44:28 GMT

i just got a message from someone that said using this one website is a violation of mercy policies? lmfao. it was weird. okay so i'm extremely bored. i have to wait and hour and a half until my final begins. woo. && i dont have ANYTHING do to. piece of crap. i think i'm going to the mall today with lindsay.

i hate how none of you ever comment on my entries anymore :[ it makes me oh so emo.
PS. meet me at the westland mall today and make me smile :D

i'm melting in his eyes.

Thu, 12 Jan 2006 19:59:14 GMT

after my 2nd hour finals, briana and i hitched a ride with renee to little ceasers, but it wasnt open :[ so we went to mcdonalds and got some breakfast, which was nasty, and they spilt they're pop everywhere and this lady was complaining about it lmao.

i dont have to study for finals anymore! my last one is open note. im so happy lol.

so briana thinks that *guy#1* likes me, but i dont know about that. i think hes just being nice. idk about *guy#2*. he acts like he does but then again, that doesnt mean anything.

guess we'll just have to wait it out.
but i like how they're making me feel :]

i never thought i could love again after my last heartbreak.
guess i was wrong...

finals suck

Wed, 11 Jan 2006 22:47:52 GMT

lindsay and i friggen walked up to taco bell today. saw some hot kids :] i lost my glitten on the way home :[ i was running in the parking lot like a retard, and did my infamous "mom?!" and i tripped and this hot guy was staring at me, and i was like "WOOAH" in my retard voice :D

went back to lindsays.
watched everyones favorite animated turtle.
made prank phone calls :

Me : hewo, dis is tai ching frum da national institute of chinks. may i have a foo moments of yer time?
Guy : who is this?
Me : duh, tai ching.
Guy : c'monnnn who is this?
Me : TAI CHING!
Guy : c'mooonnn!!

lmao. that was great.
mk gotta go study for gov't and bio.
yay :/

----edit----
god please dont tell me that i still like him. i cant like him. ever. hes changed too much, i hardly know him...

kfhsfdsa.

Tue, 10 Jan 2006 22:10:45 GMT

finals tomorrow-friday.
doubt i'll be on much.

so leave me comments&good luck :D
or call me!

woo!
i remember how much i missed the beach boys :]

NEW PHONE!!!

Mon, 09 Jan 2006 21:28:01 GMT

my mom surprised me today by getting me a brand spankin new cell phone. its alright, im just mad that she wont let me buy a ringtone so brianas gunna help me get a free one or something.
ohh and if i didnt give you my number, lemme know and i'll send it to you.

so after school, my mom picked me up and offered to take bri home and so we decided to go to burger king cuz we were hungry, duh. while there, we saw this girl from ladywood and we were staring her down and then she was staring at us lmao. this guy had this awesome jacket with random letters all over it. it was weird...and then bri and i were laughing at this fat kid.

OMG and the ladywood girl took a burger king crown and plopped it on her head lmfao!! that was the greatest. bri was making weird noises on the way to her house lmao.

now im here.
listening to some beach boys. i know your jealous :]

GAHH FINALS START IN 1 DAY SORTA...

i can't believe how stupid i was.

Mon, 09 Jan 2006 00:53:38 GMT

i dont know if my "audience" of LJ readers recall, but i liked 2 boys.

well one of them totally played me for a fool and i dont know if i should be more angry or sad. but whatever, i like the other guy more :] so see what im talking about? ALREADY i have my heart broken, a little lol.

i'm FINALLY, after TWO FUCKING YEARS, am going to redo my room. my mom is going to move the comp. downstairs so i have more room in my already big room lol. i dunno, to me, theres not a lot of space, but whatever lol.

my weekend was lame. just thought too much ALL weekend, but i hope this weekened will be different. friday is battle of the bands, saturday i might go to the mall, sunday idk, and monday is me and lindsay doosh day.

man. i forgot about how much i love this song :]

i think more than i should.

Sun, 08 Jan 2006 05:55:34 GMT

does he know how much he makes me smile? he must, or else he wouldnt keep up with the silly wise cracks. he is brilliant. simply brilliant. but i cant like him. it wouldnt work out, so why get my hopes up?

everyone knows that one.
stephanie is just a silly girl who falls in love as easily as her heart gets broken.

its so hard to write this down, because there is no way to explain him. he has brought out a whole new side to me, that no one has ever seen. whether he knows it or not remains a mystery to me. i just hope that there may be some chance he feels the same way back.

but will i ask him?
nope. i've given up on telling guys how i feel first.
it always ends in tragedy.

all i can say is that i feel like theres some sort of spark there, but i doubt it.
since when has there ever been?

i'm amused.

Sat, 07 Jan 2006 03:16:12 GMT

Your Stipper Song Is

I'm a Slave 4 U by Britney Spears

"I'm a slave for you. I cannot hold it; I cannot control it.
I'm a slave for you. I won't deny it; I'm not trying to hide it."

You may seem shy, but you can let your wild side out when you want to!

What Song Should You Strip To?

haha. i hate that song.

How much do your LJ friends love you? by ladybugadria
username
age
choose one
loves you lots	krazyswtkute72
thinks of you as their best friend	satanicnun00
pretends to like you	ccjoe
wants to move your relationship to the next level	electrojams___
wants you in bed	um_gummybear
Loves your quirkiness	____ohhtragedy
desperately loves to read your journal	lambslayer2
Loves you more than you know	flamex
thinks you are stange	the_lovely_meg

Quiz created with MemeGen!

hmm. makes me think... :P

tomorrow, i might go to the mall if i find someone to go with.
blehh.
boring day today.

why not make this public?

Thu, 05 Jan 2006 20:43:31 GMT

i might make some of my entries more public now unless theres something i just dont want people to read. idk yet.

evening of acting was so much fun! right after school, we had to set up chairs in the acting room and then do a dress rehersal for each play. i got the little headset for being on the curtains *yesss* then we ate pizza and bonded lol. and before we knew it, it was time to get ready again! everyone did so good! i was so excited and nervous, i was shaking lol. i was afraid i'd pull the curtains the wrong way or mess up my lines but i didnt :] i only took one picture because i was always doing something, but im not gunna lie. i'm definatly gunna miss my acting 2 class :*[ i think im gunna take actors workshop & this technical thing next year with ju.

how quaint.

funeral.

Wed, 09 Nov 2005 20:21:06 GMT

my mom has the funeral plans set.

tomorrow at the Martha Mary chapel in Greenfield Village. there's a special way to get in, and once i get the map from my mom, i can send it to you, or post it on my livejournal.

the mass starts at 3:30pm but my mom would like you to get there by 3:15pm or earlier if you like? it doesnt matter to me.

PS. mercy girls. directions will be at the reception area.

any questions? ask me.